High School seniors pt. 3

How do you communicate who your group in a very informal setting? One of the biggest challenges is helping high school students transition to college is helping them identify with a new group of people. This is incredibly difficult because frankly, it's intimidating. Not many people, unless they are very outgoing, like being in a brand new group where they don't know anyone or know anything about the values of the group. Often we make the mistake of thinking that people are looking for good teaching, worship, etc. While these are important, what new people are looking for the most are relationships. Are these the kinds of people that I want to be around? Does your group value relationships? Does your group allow new people to move from the perimeter to being a part of the circle? What hoops do people need to jump through in order to be accepted?

Our use of the word "community" often betrays us. We like the word and the concept and use it as a buzzword to let people know it's important. However, if it's not demonstrated before people with no words then I would say that it's not a value. It drives me crazy to no end when young pastors use the word. But unless there is something in place to relationally invite people into the group (assuming that people acknowledge their need for it), then it's an empty word. I would say, don't use the word unless you know what it means and care enough to see community instantiated.

All that to say last night we tried something that hopefully demonstrated our commitment to community. There was nothing preachy about it. I said nothing to people about it. Last night, we "kidnapped" the high school seniors and took them to Chuck E. Cheese where they met about fifteen of our college students. The college students split themselves up and sat in different groups to get to know these new students. Then they took their tokens and went and played games with them for about two hours. The comment I received from many students is, "I have not been here in years!" They had a blast...

My prayer was simply this. That they would experience the beginnings of community with us. We want our students to go deep with each other. We want to learn together and have each other's back in ministry. But just as important, we want to have fun together. There was nothing like yelling together with a bunch of them as we played a group video game of "Deal or No Deal". I hope that it put to rest any thoughts that the college group is not welcoming or stuffy. All this to say, when it comes to fostering community in your group and attracting new people, don't think that it has to start with something really serious or deeply spiritual. What appears to be spontaneous as well as fun (yes, we can use that word) can be the entry point to people sharing their lives together. There's nothing like yelling and laughing together that begins the process of bonding people together.

High school seniors pt. 2

I journaled this morning that this spring I have felt very much tugged in every direction. As a result, I haven't updated this blog as often as I should have. Here is a second part to the previous blog that was written (embarrassingly) last month.

I just returned from a weekend waterski trip to Lake Havasu with this years' high school senior class. This is probably the fifth year we have done this. Here's how this developed... both the high school pastor and I realized that come June students face this incredible transition. They go from years of attending at 9 am in the morning to nothing since we have college group at night (and that's by design). In addition, there was really nothing in place other than a banquet to serve as their last hurrah together in high school. So we decided to have a waterski trip held before they graduate in June, inviting me to come and along (as the cook) with a few of our college leadership.

In the midst of this great weekend of fun and relationships, it really represents their last time together as well introducing me as their new pastor. I only speak to them once but most of it is relational, just getting to know them. I ask for the list of students attending early so that I can start memorizing their names (believe me, that gets hard). When I meet them at the retreat I write down on the sheet of paper a simple fact about them to help me remember. What blows their minds sometimes is that when I hear their first name I already know their last name or when I meet them for the second time and I remember their names. All of this is to help soften the blow of the transition that is rapidly approaching.These people really are the most important people in the church!

But what's most important is this: whether they are going away to school or staying in the area, I want them to see my heart for God and for them. They are not pawns to get to a greater end (like more people to bump numbers up). Rather, they are people, young adults that need someone to shepherd them into a greater relationship with Jesus. I realized early on that credibility is one of the most important factors in a relationship because it leads to trust.

The point of all of this is that if it's true that your freshmen class is the most important class to focus on, then it's important that you as a pastor are intentional and helping with the transition process. The jump from high school to college is threatening enough. If you build small bridges like this to build trust with them, the whole process will feel much easier. Give me your thoughts on this and any ideas that you have tried. I'm sure open to trying different things!